Cool and Funny Facebook status

Dearest Readers,

So, most of you reading this will have facebook and are probably found this because they were trying to find some cool status's to post. Well, here is my complied list of statuses I've found from all over the net. Feel free to copy, paste and use these :)


To find your cool robot name, take the first 16 digits of your credit card and combine with the start/expiry dates and security code. What’s yours?

Some interesting stats... 3,190,374 people are having sex right now, 2,212,130 are kissing, and 1 poor person is reading this post. Sucks to be you!

Learn from Pandora's mistake - think outside of the box

If a mute person burps, does it make a sound?
To err is human. To arr is pirate

I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said, "Parking Fine"

Finding a job in this economy is like playing "Where's Waldo?"... except that Waldo is looking for a job, too.

Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status.

 My wife said I’m too immature and if I don’t grow up it’s going to erect a barrier between us. Ha ha ha, erect.

 If guys had periods, they’d brag about the size of their tampons.

Make love, not war. Hell, do both. Get married.

 ٩(•̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶

 _̴ı̴̴̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡̡ ̡ ̴̡ı̴̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡

 if only life came with a ◄◄ REW ► PLAY ▌▌PAUSE █▌STOP

 scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status.

 ̿̿̿ ̿’ ̿’̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε/̵͇̿̿/’̿’̿ ̿ this is a stick-up… give me ALL yo [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅1̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]!

 Cut here —————–✄———————-

I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
 
Teacher: "I am beautiful. What tense is this?" Student: "Obviously past."


Take Care,

Alley